Pacifying the screaming toddler within

She started screaming while I was making roast potatoes last night.


I want to dye my hair brown! (who am I kidding, I love my hair colour, gingers rule.)

Or throw out all my clothes and create a totally new style! (actually, no, colour blocked pencil skirts are great.)

Or move to Azerbaijan! (not while my job, husband, flat and oh yeah, city are so awesome.)

But I’m ready for a change of…something!

The roast potatoes weren’t very impressed.

(They rarely are.)

Fall is an almost painful season for the slow build of financial prudency. It’s full of anticipation and promise – but we know we have to sit tight and let our good habits do their work.

And these habits are doing pretty well. I’m putting a third of my income toward debt and a little more towards savings – and fantasising about how fast those savings will stack up once my debt is gone and I can put the full amount away every month.

But there’s a stroppy toddler inside me, and that stroppy toddler is stamping her feet and shouting “Want it NOW!”

And to her, I can only say:

Chill out.

Your time will come.

And I give her a pacifier. Like the whirlwind of London Cocktail Week, or a day out visiting free museums and historical sites around the city – or a delicious roast dinner and movie at home with my delicious husband.

And wait.

The doubts begin to creep into my mind.

What if you’re hit by a bus tomorrow? Will you really be able to say you’ve led a satisfied life, with all the money you’ve packed away instead of enjoying?

You shouldn’t hoard money like a miser. A Christmas Carol was a morality tale, not a how-to!

Just make the minimum payments and live it up this month. You deserve it! It’s your birthday! It’s your anniversary! It’s Christmas!

What these are all code for:

I’m not getting my way and I don’t like it!

Well, you know what?

Tough shit, kid.

Because in a few years, when the debt is gone and the savings are starting to pile up…

…you’re going to be the most pumped kid on the playground.

Running out of money eight hours into the month: a very spoooooky payday


Halloween pub

This means today, after paying all my monthly bills and making debt payments – this month’s contribution to the “not getting kicked out of the UK visa” debt payoff fund, as well as the absolute minimum I can put towards my student loans every month and still knock them out before I hit 30 – I’m already £170 overdrawn. Again. And November hasn’t even started yet. (Thankfully it’s a short month.)

I’ve therefore decided to use GUMPTION to earn £170 this month and theoretically save myself from overdraft charges. At the moment, plan for GUMPTION includes:

  • Selling books on Amazon
  • Picking up freelance work on Elance;
  • Drinking cupfuls of boxed red wine and trying to write porn to sell on Kindle. (I have it on very good authority that people who write bad spanking porn are basically just millionaires in waiting. All of them!)
  • Genteelly hating bloggers who go “Oh, I’ve set up my blog for passive income and now it makes money for me while I travel the world, haha!”
  • Going to the pub. Because some people may turn down a London craft beer pub crawl on payday, but those people are not me.

(No goals for November, they’ll just depress me when I inevitably fail to achieve them.)

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